When I was younger and I was going through my trials as a teenager, my mom told me something that I’ve thought about ever since. I think I had gone through a rift in a friendship and I was very upset about it. She told me that I was the kind of person who always welcomed other people into my life and even though this friend was hurting me, someday in the future if they ever needed someone to talk to, they would always know they could still call me and have a shoulder to lean on. I think about it sometimes because I wonder if it’s true. I try to be very introspective and fix things that hinder me. I give myself Dr. Phil’s advice constantly, and I’m very open to constructive criticism. I want to be a good person, I want to do better and to be better every day. I try very hard to make people feel liked and appreciated.

Then I also start to wonder: Does my tree bear fruit? Are people saying bad things about me? I think this is so important to consider from time to time. If something in my life keeps repeating itself, then it probably has something to do with me and not so much other people. Something that has always come to bite me in the butt is my big mouth. I wear my emotions on my sleeve, which most of the time that can be a good thing, but sometimes I make mistakes and say or do things I shouldn’t. I say this because it’s something I constantly struggle with, thinking before I speak. Does anyone else have this problem? Even though sometimes this can be a bad thing, most of the time I think this can be a good thing. I am quick to send someone an email telling them how much I love them, quick to reach out to someone struggling, quick to be vulnerable to tell someone I want to help. I just hate feeling stupid if they don’t respond. Then I know they have that thing called, “self-control”. I wish I had some of that!

Another thing we should consider is are we takers or are we givers? I struggle with this. Not because I don’t want to give, but when money is tight, I tend to be little stingy. But not even with just money, are we building others up, are we being positive, are we giving others the benefit of the doubt? Or are we talking about ourselves too much, or constantly talk about negativity, and the worst of all, are we bringing others down to feel better about ourselves? I know that in my life I can be quick to take from others and slow to offer what I have. “You can’t change something that you don’t acknowledge”-Dr. Phil. Since I know that I struggle with this, I make conscious steps to be more considerate of others.

One new phrase that I really dislike is, “just sayin”. Every time I have seen it it has been so condescending. For instance: Kanye to Taylor, “Beyoncé had the best video of the year, just sayin’.” or “My baby is cuter than yours, just sayin’.” or “My husband is perfect, just sayin’.” I challenge you to think next time you write that phrase, is it condescending to other people because you think you are right? Just because you have an opinion doesn’t make it right nor universal. Whoa, I went off on a little tangent in the middle of this. See what I mean?! There it is again, I say how I feel when I feel it.

Anyways, going back to what my mom said, I do hope I make people feel welcome and am a safe place to fall. When somebody comes to us, do they expect us to be abrasive or welcomed? Do we act how we think Jesus would act? Do we put our feelings before others? Bust most importantly are we treating people the way we expect to be treated? I hope some of you comment and let me know some things that you currently struggle with. We should all hold each other to a higher standard!



5 Responses to “Rambling:”
  1. Denise Bourn says:

    I just love your posts that you post ..I really enjoy reading them and most of them just always catch my eye like this post…I just want you to know you think A LOT like me..

  2. Sheila Gunderson says:

    You are right on baby girl… I just posted this on my facebook page… It requires less character to discover the faults of others, than to tolerate them! But, it takes more character to discover the faults within ourselves and to change them! You have wisdom for such a young age! Keep digging deep and remember forgiveness is the key word!!! You make me very proud!!!

  3. Sarah says:

    I love u, we need to see escorted soon, I have today off let’s talk on the phone!

  4. Robin says:

    You are amazing. My biggest issue I think is keeping my mouth shut when other people have hurt me. I tend to over analyze it, over think it and end up just blaming it on myself. In marriage I’ve learned to communicate everything but outside of it, not so much!
    I admire you so much for being so truthful and honest. I wish I wasn’t afraid of telling people how I feel. Friendship is so important to me and when I do come across a friendship, I hold on to it like it’s the last thing in the world. And as you know, it’s defiantly back fired on me- because I didn’t tell them how I felt when they hurt me!
    Anyway, I love you and when I was reading this I was thinking, Go Nakesha for having a blog and making it up lifting for others, not all about “me me me me.”

    I love you I love you I love you.

    Thank God for MySpace ;) hahah

  5. Julie says:

    I love this. and you’re so right, being poor doesnt mean I cant love on people! and another phrase I absolutely hate, but is similar to just sayin’ is “just kidding” after the person says something really mean and hostile. Ugh.

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